At a Subway several years back, I ordered a "small" Coke. "We don't have small, we only have medium, large and jumbo", the mentally-challenged doofus said. I pointed out that, by definition, you can't have a medium if there's nothing smaller, because medium comes between something smaller and something larger. He didn't understand. I think he had a ring in his ear.
Recently, the kids wanted to go to Peter Piper Pizza. If you've never been there, avoid it at all cost. It's full of screaming little brats. Anyway, I ordered the food, and then, based on the sign, ordered small drinks (the sign listed "kids", "small" and "large" sizes). Since my run-in several years ago with the doofus at a Subway, I've always looked at the sign and ordered one of the sizes specified on the sign, but even that didn't work this time. The high-school kid working the counter set several "kids" sized cups on the counter. "I wanted THAT size", I said, pointing to the somewhat larger cup. "That's a medium", he said. "We only have "small", "medium" and "large." "According to the sign", I said, "you have kids, small and large sizes, no mediums. And I ordered a small, which is THAT one." I still don't think he understood. He had a ring in his ear too.
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